unpredictable journal

31 August 2008

This morning jumped out of bed when I look at the clock, already 7am. I thought that I'm working this Saturday. But realised that was my off day, so went back to sleep. 10am++ sms Gina that I'm interested in going to the scc for the omnia phone promo. But decided to drop by handphone shop to check out the price first.

Was an hour late, but she wasn't angry. Thanks for her understanding. =) And we saw him, intend to walk over and say hello, but he was busying working. Get many advise from friends that omnia is better than i-phone, so went to singtel, M1 and starhub and did a comparison. Decided to get omnia from singtel, but when doing the registration, the sales person told me that I cannot recontract my current line as it's less than a year. So I told her then I'll get a new line instead. Processing.. and the system promted her that because I'm less than 21years old, I can only subscript with one singtel line. So went to M1 to see if they 've omnia black, they said stock will be replenished only next week. So went to Starhub, and they've it... but was the last piece. Of course I bought it. Thanks girl for paying for me first. Happy, because who will be willing to borrow a friend 775bucks?

By right should be meeting dear as he was just nearby jur area. But he was playing MJ with his friends, so... Sighs, guess m silly to pack my bag and carried it out. Thought will be going over to his place. Anyway, already over.

Reached home, transfer the money back to Gina and explored my omnia. =) Like it... but still not very sure how to use most of the functions in it. Continue exploring tml with my friends. Yey, tomorrow finally can meet up with my good friends, Qin and Kelly le. Missed 'em badly.

Oh yah, by the way the omnia phone I got it for dear. But dear said he do not want it nehx... see how first bahs. Haix...

Good night.

I hope I'll luv myself more

02:03

30 August 2008

Nice working day yesterday, but last min there's this meeting conducted by Bernie and it lasted for an hour instead of half an hour stated in the email. Only 10% of the highlighted points related to us.

Get to know from Gina there's this Omnia phone for free if sign up 2years plan. Shit... I've 3phones in mind.

1. i-phone

2. omnia

3. n96

Argh... craziness. No time to read up the specific functions of these three phone. So later gonna drop by handphone shop to pick up brochures. One more thing is... should I trade away my N95? I just want all the messages inside the internal memory. Worth?

Sighs... so gotta go wash up my clothes and get prepared to meet Gina at WM and then head down to Suntec. Evening meeting dear, =) But if I go over to his place, then tomorrow gotta think how to meet up with Kelly. Maybe wake up early and travel from bedok back home and then meet her as usu to cheveron to make payment. Then heading to bugis to shop. Finally we could meet up.

I hope I'll luv myself more

11:46

29 August 2008

E moment I stepped into branch, she questioned me in a very pissed off manner that why didn't I keep my stamps inside cash box. I admit I deserve the scolding, sighs. Just so suay this week, every morning kena nagged. Sobss... I was so stressed because FM wasn't around, no one to guide me but able to survive!

Meet up with Gina @ JE platform, and we took train to Chinese Garden as we were heading to JESC. Reached there, gym was very packed so thinking of going to the stadium for jog. But the stadium was already closed? So we took train back to BL and head to JSC instead. Went to the gym, great workout. SHIOK! I loves the sweating all over feeling. It simply makes me feel good esp right after taking a cold shower. =)

Accompanied her back to JP to wait for bus, and so sickening of the bus arrived only about twenty or half an hour later =( Dear called when I'm inside bus... and nice chat with him though he reached home late. =) For once dd said that to me. =D

FM injured her legs when playing BB, so later gotta go out to buy lunch back. =( No time to send my cheque out, gotta pay my bills via IB again.

I hope I'll luv myself more

11:44

27 August 2008

Finally watched the movie 'Space Chimps' and 'Meet Dave' with Gina last evening. Thumbs up for both! =) Thanks lady for ur time and accompaniment.

Was extremely exhausted that I felt so lazy to return call back to dear. Guess Chua disturbing him again, sighs. Gosh, the matter was like few weeks back? And anyway was his own fault to hit people head with the jug.

I thought I'll never think about drinking any more, but why she always talk without thinking that her words might hurt others feeling? Since executive director is nothing to you, then prove it that you can be promoted to that position in 1year time. So what you've a title at work, but you've no friend. Remember that... Don't always take menopause to be an excuse when you vent your anger on us. Perhaps, you forgotten again... we're your staffs and not your dogs, bear in mind. One more time of intolerance, I think I should tender. Because my brother said "What most important is, be Happy @ work".

Really appreciate Ming Da intention of wanting to celebrate my 21st birthday for me. But you know last year my plan was to celebrate my 21st at TW with good friend Kelly. But looks like my birthday is not her school holiday and I've not save enuf for my trip yet. So... =) M not saying that you're unfit to celebrate my birthday for me, u're silly to said that and I forbid you to said that again. N don't be crazy to treat me to sky dining, I just wish to have sky dining with him before his trip to Australia. Unless, I pay for it then we go together. Deal?

Reach home I should..

1. Do laundry

2. Jogging

3. Have a good sleep

Tomorrow Fo Mei on leave as she's going to buy flat with her boyfriend. So I'd be alone, friends pls do me a favour. Pray that time flies fast tomorrow... otherwise I think I'll lose my control and show my attitude.

I hope I'll luv myself more

11:28

26 August 2008

Was blogging when dear called when he was on his way home last night. I don't sound good and I dislike to be like this to him. Was half way texting him my thoughts, my mobile rang. Hesitate to pick up at first, but I answered. Shared with dear my thoughts, my feeling and for once I felt the assurance from him.

.. thx my dear ..

I hope I'll luv myself more

12:00

Reached work place this morning and was being questioned why I left without a word at the training last Saturday. BOM said if I informed her, she'll let me go as she expected it. But who knows?

Checked my e-pay slip looks like overtime not being credited, wonder why. Log on ID for vision plus system had became inactive, encounting endless error messages. =(

After work went to Emily place to do my lashes, yeppy! Like it a lot, guess the next time I can go for 12mm with lots of glue to darken it.

Went to JP to get A4 paper cuz I wanna print my M5 module notes, not dare to use company paper. Silly right? But I'm like this, don't bother about me. Ha...

Headed back to mummy place, wah... it has been donkey years since I felt being doted by my 2 brothers and mummy. Mummy pampered me so much. Talked to mum that I wanna take my M5 cert, she asked me to go ahead. And asked her if I should take my car licence, she said... go ahead and she'll pay for me. But asked me not to let the rest of 'em know. But mum, you're not the first one to say you're willing to pay for me. That time jiejie and korkor also dragged me to join 'em and they said they're willing to pay for me if I wanna take my licence. Mummy, is not all about passing the licence. What I'm more concern is, so what with a licence without a car? Owing a car is darn ex, and I don't earn that much that I'd afford to pay the monthly installment all by myself. So forget about it. But did promised korkor to take car licence with him and promised jiejie to take bike licence with her. Cuz korkor gotten his bike licence long ago and jiejie gotten her car licence last year too. Me? Nothing. Haha... anyway, mummy remembered that my birthday's coming, she asked what I like. Hees, obviously she's getting one for me. But I don't want anything from her, just wanna her to be happy and IF I'm celebrating, then I'd want her to be there. Dad went out and got back home pretty late. Anyway, dad was so lucky to receive the first prize from the lucky draw. Was a F1 model car, darn nice. How nice if dad can give it to me as a gift IF I owe a flat in future. Out of the blue, I love my family so so so much.

Dear, this evening is not really a special day but at least m trying to make an effort to mark this day, a lil' different. But looks like... we didn't meet up. And your promises to be home early, never ever fulfil before. Seriously my dear, the very beginning of us being together are so much different now. My effort in pleasing you, entertaining your friends/colleagues/customers when you wanted me to. My effort in sending you cookies (knowing you're having sore throat, but afraid that you wouldn't have the time to go out and eat when famished. So thought you could have a few bites of your fav cookies.) Herbal tea for you to cool down your body heat, breakfast for you afraid that you might forgotten, wrote you a card for your commentary exam motivating you along though was already 2am plus in the mid night and I've to wake up after 3hrs 45mins of sleep to prepare for work. Gotta send all that to your office and rushed my way to work. My effort, did you see it? Dear, I'm willing to scarified anything for you. Be it silly things that you made me do, I'll. Dear, when will be the day comes where we'd have dinner together with my mom, my parents, my family and of course, with Zann. I'm looking forward for that day, did you know? Dear dear, I'm not complaining about you for not spending your time with me. I just wanna you to drink less and be home early. Thats all... don't promise me things that you know very well that it'd be broken.

Dear, pls tell me that promises are not meant to be broken.

I hope I'll luv myself more

00:54

23 August 2008

Went over to dear*2 place last night, and the driver was so nice that he asked me to have a good rest when I alighted. But he didn't drove me to dear blk, cuz couldn't find his blk. Alighted and find my way to his house, cuz don't wanna him to come down and wait for me at the void deck. Scare he'd be tired. But who knows, he called and said he's on his way back home. =(

Asked dear to open his gate, then he asked me why. Ahem... =) Dear showed me his approval letter from the tourism board. DD, m happy and proud of you. Dear made me do something silly for him, I'll never forget.

Dear said once I pass my licence he can buy me a car, a flat. But dear, I do not know the road direction. Hees... he said he'll guide me. Haha... dear dear said if he buy me a car, I've to send him to work and fetch him from work. So I rather dear dear send me to work in the morning and pick me up from my workplace in the evening. Dear licence being revoke gotta wait for another 1.5yrs. Nah, he never learn from his lesson, that's why. =D

N I finally know why...

This morning dd snatched away my blanket, arhg... madness. He switched on the air con and the fan, was freezing hell cold my dear. Woke up to switch off his fan, then went to bath. Bath out, saw his mom. Greeted her, she acknowledged =) I love his sis-in-law, because she was very nice to me. Was waiting for dd to wake up and send me to work, but he didn't. I also didn't wake him up to open the gate for me. I just took his key from his table and open the gate. Then asked his sis-in-law to pass the key back to him. I took cabby for R** Big Welcome Training.

And damn, is the first time that m gonna say... a training that was so boring that I doze off through out, even my manager sat right next to me. I really couldn't control, couldn't focus, couldn't stay alert. Left the training when was being given break time at 3pm.

luv ytd nite tt I spent w dear

Feeling kinda unwell.

I hope I'll luv myself more

18:20

22 August 2008

Last evening after work went to meet Zann @ Junction 8 to have dinner together. Lil' Malcom always sleepy when we meeting out and always naughty when his mummy wanna eat. After bringing him for a scroll, he was soundly aslept. =) By then, dinner already cold... poor sister.

Went walking shopping around, and accompanied 'em back home. Visited her place, was very clean and things were neatly arranged. =) Left pretty soon, as it was already 9pm plus. Malcom looks exhausted.

Reached home around 10.30pm, washed up my clothes. By the time I settled down, already pass 12am.

S usual dear called, e very first question he asked if I'm tired of being his dear. Silly question, of course not. So what you rang me every night in the middle of my sleep? Wondering is the *times that dear kept reminding me not to earn more than 3k. =) Then dear you earn 8k/mth and support me, then I can be at home to be taitai. Think my life will be shorten by 10yrs! =D

Rotted at work, the air con gonna freeze me soon.

having headache

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:52

21 August 2008

Out of the 41days that I been working, there's only one day I'm happy at work. The remaining of the 40days had been wearing a mask facing my colleagues. Strange enough, I thought we'll tends to be closer with each other when the entire team is smaller? Looks I'm serving one customer, must the other 3 stood behind me and monitoring me? How will the customer thinks of me? Yepp, I'm new to this bank and I knew system is inflexible thus we can be more flexible. But come on, should we standardise our practice? Why in banking line there're so many exceptions? Alright, we were doing client a favour. But are you sure that in future if client faced the same problem, he/she won't be asking you to help him/her just once more? People always take things for granted.

moo moody at work

I hope I'll luv myself more

12:26

20 August 2008

This morning when I reached work place, then I discovered that I left my drawer key at home. Officer nearly asked me to take cabby back home to take it, silly isn't it. And I believe, definitely will have spare keys for it. She called Jasmine at ORQ and found out that the spare keys are kept inside the vault. Guess what? 5 spare keys. I only need 1, luckily. Otherwise, who's going to reimburse me my cabby fare?

When I starts to love my job, she ruined it. CRO direct customer to her room, wasn't my fault. She complaints and pass all transactions to me while she sat down there logging into her you tube account and watch her drama show. Is kinda unfair, especially when I already have lots of things pending for me to do.

Tomorrow, Eileen Fong gonna be back. Should I be happy or should I be sad? Sighs... with her around... she nags so much that I couldn't stand it. No freedom in doing things in my own ways. Everything must follow suits her. ArGh... mAdN3Se...

Zann, thanks for your concern over Eric and I. We're good, just that I'm a lil' tired in this r'ship. But once again, you spoke all the + points for him and even questioned me "He's not in his younger days. Certain things like assurance he might overlook.U keep saying to him that if he finds somebody better, he can go ahead. What kind of assurance are you giving him?" I admit, was my fault, was my fault.

When he needed to be reassured, I gave him my assurance once more. When I needed his assurance, did he? I've no status to his colleague (except the night at the chalet)/friends/clients. I've no sense of sercurity from him, that was because he clicked on so well with people he just met especially the females.

In the beginning, you were saying that I've no time for you. But now? Everything has changed.

Sighs.

When we gonna have our...

Bak kuk teh dinner

Canadian pizza

Seafood dinner

Anyway, congrat dear dear for passing his commentary exam and got his licence. =) Dear, happy and proud of you. Looks, your hard work paid off. =D

Contradicted, when can I believe things that you had said?

I hope I'll luv myself more

23:24

Someone forward the following message to all of us:

Today is a special day,
20082008 (Double Fa)
which happens once in a lifetime
Wishing you good health, good luck and happiness, always.
Have a Wonderful Day.

And didn't expect boss to reply:

Oh YES!
Everybody HUAT AH!!
20082008

I thought... hahAHA!

I hope I'll luv myself more

16:39

19 August 2008

By e way, Sunday night I was suffering insomnia couldn't sleep at all. So yesterday night slept pretty early, about 9pm. Dear called around 1am? Had a good chat with him, that was because he drank a lil' more. I told him I noticed we could only chat slightly longer when he drank a lil' more. Dear asked "Then you prefer me to drink a lil' lesser or more?" I told dear of course I prefer him to drink lesser. Glad that he knew is for his own goods. If I know his parents gonna be away to Genting, I'll go over. Knowing that you dote me a lot, and even if you really mean to ask me quit working, I won't. Unless, I no longer to work fast... that is when I'm old.

Dear must be very happy that his customer (a young lady) invited him over to her place for dinner. M I right?

By right should be meeting Gina to watch "Meet Dave" together. But her nose bleeding. Take good care yah?

BOM had been away for holiday and gonna be back on Thursday. Life without her at work was so much happier, and much more peaceful. Lesser incoming phone call from her Kai Zai, Krist. That troublesome RM, who always ask for new notes. =( But he's a very caring person. Still could remember that, that time I nearly scald my hand when making hot milo, he said "A... xiao xin xiao xin..." =)

Is the third week of August, gonna be alone for Saturday duty from September onwards. Starts to learn vault stuffs, kinda like it. =D But very scare that eyes play trick on me, all along I couldn't read numerical well. If I record wrongly on the vault register book, then she's gonna nag. NAG. nAg at me. God bless me!

As day pass by, I learnt many new things and I felt satisfied with my performance. I saw the improvement on myself. And though sometimes I really tired of all the endless transactions, and she was down there watching you tube couldn't be bother to help me out a lil', I won't be mad. Seriously, I like it... time flies faster that way. I love being pressurized.

Chat with good friend Agnes in MSN this morning. Then I know that both of us shared the same interest in becoming financial adviser. Hees. Learnt from her that the basic cert we need is M5, M8 and M9. Anyway, didn't expect to cost only SGD107 bucks. Gonna try out soon, waiting for her to email me the materials.

I'm so interested in selling bank products. Investment, endowment plans, insurance. But overall, still prefer to sell credit cards. Haa...

DD mug hard for your commentary examination tomorrow, but don't stay up till too late. Cuz you gotta wake up early. Jia you, jia you my dear. =)

Dearest Doreen, don't be bothered about what they said and proof 'em wrong. Lets jia you together and work towards our goals. =D Be confident, cuz m sure u can do it. Recover soon.

Gonna wash up and sleep, tired.

I wanna start jogging soon, last time stopped was because of mummy comments. =( Haha... then I wanna head to the gym too. I wanna change my lifestyle. Drinking a bottle of martell at Chillz cost me 168bucks which I can use it to take M5 cert. Maybe starts me driving licence too.

Gastric on and off, leave me alone pls. ='(

Oh ya... make an effort to look through newspaper/mails for job. If you waiting for friend to introduce, why not wait for money to fall from the skies even better right? Jia you, jia you...

On cloud nine

I hope I'll luv myself more

10:19

18 August 2008

Unusual Monday, today branch was so quiet. Everything done by 4.30pm, slacking till 5pm and took bus 700 to the building next to ORQ. Realised that Bus 700 can go to dear work place, next time can send dinner up without having to take train. =) Alright, by right should be there attending a talk by RBS but when all of us reached there, the autitorium already fully seated. The talk ended before 6.30pm, dear called at the right time. =)

I hope I'll luv myself more

21:34

17 August 2008

Good evening.

Loves this weekend so much! =) Been sleeping the entire days and nights, whoo. Feeling so great, but dear gotta go out and do some research for his exam on Wednesday. Coming Saturday have to attend a seminar from 9-6pm. =(

I wanna watch Space Chimps, Fate, Meet Dave, and Bachna Ae Haseeno.

I hope I'll luv myself more

17:54

16 August 2008

Guess dear*2 was touched by the breakfast/tea/cookies/card that I sent over in the morning to his office. Asked me if I wanna join him at Chillz, I went since gastric already felt better after takin the medication. Thought I'll join him and friend for an hour or so, but we only left @ 12am++. Glad to see GTA Gina and Shawn so lovely again. Gina was looks so gorgeous as compared to the first time I met her at the chalet. No wonder people say women in love, looks different.

Anyway, shouldn't 've joined dear and friends yesterday. I said that, that was because of jealousy. I believe no matter how generous/open/understanding a gf saw another girl who's just a customer of dear hugging him be it just a sec, you'll definitely jealous. If Jasmine, Gina or Eileen gave him a hug. I swear, I won't feel that way. That was because they are dear good friends and colleagues for years. They always go drink together after work. I'm glad that dear 've them to be by his side.

I've told dear earlier on that trust is very important in a r'ship. So I told dear dear that I guess I've to get used to his over friendliness to people he just get to know less than an hour. Is either I take it, or a break off. But I won't, because I trust you, dear.

Me: "You'll never get happiness from Eric"

Celest: "I'm glad you know that" giving me a pat on my head.

~~If I bear, I'll let you go now before I get hurts deeper~~

I hope I'll luv myself more

10:56

Hectic day @ work, reached home did my laundry and took a nap from 5-9pm. Woke up by dear's call. Online to do booking for Kelly's Chalet. But looks like only all chalets are fully booked except for NTUC. But requires 3day 2nights of booking, which she do not want.

Damn having headache again. =(

I hope I'll luv myself more

00:56

15 August 2008

Dear called last night but didn't notice that my mobile rang, hmm... how I wish I've spare cash to trade away my N95 before it value falls further down. Dear asked how was my meet up with Zann, I was full of anger that I told dear about it. Dear said wanna offer Zann his place to let her and baby Malcom stay over. So I gave dear her number. Hees, dear really sms her. Crazy, seriously 've no idea what dear sms her, but shortly I got a sms from her. When I've cool down, I'll text you again.

This morning manage to wake up early, but didn't manage to leave house on time. And luckily I took cabby down to dear workplace otherwise I'd be late for work. And darn lucky of me that Patrick was inside the office, if not then guess I'll 've to pass it to the security guard. =) Anyway, Patrick still remembers me. Cuz I thought he's dear colleague that I never meet before. Patrick completed my sentence for me, that I just wanna drop something on dear's desk.

After which took train to work, slightly late but guess is okies bahs. And on my way to work, my gastric pain comes back again. Hell... so went down to the 8th floor to see the doctor, cost me 39.95bucks. =( Another 50bucks just gone like this.

Dear called, yesterday asked me not to send anything up to his office, then today he sounded so happy on the phone. =)

I hope I'll luv myself more

12:46

14 August 2008

Knocked off went to JP to buy herbal tea, tomorrow breakfast, famous amous cookies and card for dear. Gonna send to his office tomorrow morning, hopefully m able to wake up early.

About to unpack my stuffs, Zann called and sobbing away. She asked if I could come out and meet her. I didn't said much on the phone and told her I would take a cab down shortly.

Reached her house void deck, waited and waited for about an hour. Finally she sms, said that she was talking with her hubby thinking of a solution. Would meet me when she finished. I was totally taken aback by that, that I sent her a very nasty sms. I'm sick and tired of pretending to be a noble friend to all of you. I had been having gastric since last weeks, it has been on going for so many days. Planned to do my laundry this evening, but you called and I was so worried sick for you. Took a cab and rushed down all the way to Ang Mo Kio and this is what you replied me. Good. Then get back to me only when your hubby is not there for you!

I'm stupid, I'm gullible, I'm good to be cheated, I'm friends ATM. Thanks so much to my friends to make me realised that I'm the world S.T.U.P.I.D.I.O.U.S person. I'll get my mobile no changed as soon as possible and never ever wanna to get in contact with anyone of you. You people just sucks to core!!! Especially you baby, asked me out for drink, pretending to be there to accompany. In actual fact, should be the vice versa bahs. Always asked us out to drink, since when you treated us a bottle of heineken back? No, never! Only your precious Sharon whom u got to know 2weeks gets a bucket treat from you. Idiotic! You paid or not yet for that bucket of heineken on Saturday night, you should know very well. Stop feigning ignorance.

And the person makes me so mad was you, my good sister, Zann. I'm really thankful of you being there for me keeping me occupied for my weekends when Eric was away to KL for meeting. You assured me that he would return a call. At that point of time, I really needed that assurance. Thanks. Now you facing a problem, I promised to be there for you. But I left because of my attitude. I'm sorry, sorry for not able to be that noble friend any more. Because I'm sick and tired of being so fake. Pretending to be rich when I'm not. I earn 1k spend 2k, because of friends. Sick, SICK, sick. I hope your hub and you had already think out of a solution for the problem you two faced.

Here's the nasty comment for you "Come on, if you're capable go out and work and earn your own money and ask you hubby to move out since you couldn't get along well with his aunt. If you're not capable, then you've to learn to accept her, cuz you're living at her place. Sorry, everything at home might be paid by your hubby, but do you think your hub will chase her out of the house because of you? No, never! I already told you to endure, and you sounded so confident that you would not hesistate to say her the next time you're unhappy of her doings. And now, you lose. Happy?

Dear, I'm gonna tell you something though you do not 've my blog address, but one find day this is what I'm gonna tell you. I don't care if I'm being over sensitive, your mom don't seems to like me. I understand and know why. And I doubt my characteristic would be able to stay together with your parents. You told me that you wanna took over you parent house, fine with it. But dear, can we move out first IF we gonna settled down? I don't wanna you to be middle person, cuz I know you dotes your parents and I a lot. So we'll go back on the Friday night and stay over till Sunday evening after dinner we'll go back home eh? Just like your sister and brother. =)

T Zhi Yi, L Hui Juan you two better leave me far far away. Don't wanna see a sight of you people. Fuck off man!

L Jing Jing, I'll give you one more chance. But temp, you better don't sms or call me.

Don't always use the word "Sorry" I simply hate it! Put yourselves into my shoes and you'll know that kind of feeling is extremely terrible.

Hectic day at work, yet this is how 140808 passed.

Alright, m superior tired. Gonna take a shower and rest.

One thing I wanna say "Kelly & Qin, you two are my only true friends, 11years of friendship, never ever you girls hurt me before. So thankful that we're still in contact! Seriously, missed you girls badly. Can we just meet up for a dinner, just an hour will do. Spare your precious time for me please."

I hope I'll luv myself more

22:37

Helped Eileen Fong to celebrate her birthday before she go to Hong Kong for holiday. =) Bought her the D24 Durian cake from Emi Cake Shop, everyone loves it! =) Only manage to leave branch at 7pm, not claiming OT cuz I, myself wanna wait for FM to finish up her work. So coincident that we're both heading to PS. She meeting her mom and sister down there for dinner and I meeting dear for movie.

Took bus to PS and saw TY working at there, chatted with him. Headed down to Mac to buy Big Mac for dear. Hmm... watch so many movie with dear, seems like I was always earlier to reach. Watched 12 Lotus, rating 3/5

Dear feeling unwell, guess later gonna get him herbal tea. Is damn silly to send to his house doorsteps right? Think tomorrow wake up earlier and send it to his office bahs. =) First time do such silly thing.

This morning woke up late, but didn't take cabby to work because Eileen Fong is on leave. Yeppy! Rosie she's not that particular. So... saved 25bucks!

Happy Birthday To Eileen Fong & Judy Teoh

I hope I'll luv myself more

12:03

13 August 2008

Haven't been looking after my niece for quite some time. Yesterday night mom dropped by and gave her money but lil' niece insisted that she don't want it. Asked me to bank into her granny account. Was being asked by my sis to make milk for my lil' niece as she was doing her manicure. So walked into the kitchen, lil' niece asked if I could teach her spelling and writing. Come on, my dear lil' girl was already 11.30pm. Time to sleep. She refused to go into the room herself first, she wanted to wait for her parents. But both her parents were doing their own things. Sighs. I'll never sleep late when a child's waiting for me to turn in with him/her. So I accompanied her to sleep, was already darn sleepy, she was down there turning left and right, talking non-stop herself. When dear called I already slept like dead log. He didn't keep his promise, sigh... used to it.

How nice if I can wake up early everyday just like this morning. =)

sleepy

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:06

12 August 2008

Without fail, expected. I think all my hard earn money 40% gone to cabby fare, 30% gone on drink, 20% gone to parents. Only 10% on my own transport and food.

I took cabby to work again, the earlier I slept the more I'll be late, ****

Think today not going down to Chillz, cuz dear and friends might be heading to Barnone which is very near to my workplace. Kinda stupid to take train down to Raffles and take train back to Orchard and join dear and his friends right? So, I'll settle the bill tomorrow evening, might want to finish up my martell as well. And after that, I'll never drink unless to entertain dear's client.

Heard from dear that they quarrelled, wondering whats went wrong between 'em. Worried for her, sighs. And I wonder whats wrong with dear too. Dear suddenly sent me the sms, hmm... don't wanna talk about it

Alright, gotta work.

Shit, so rotted at work. M still having gastric and headache. Wanna go down and see the doctor, but sighs. Dear asked me to be home and rest but I insisted to go with him cuz I promised. Scare he'd be mad with me if I drink later on. =(

Good offer online

Bank Clerk, 5days work

9-6.30pm

1.4-2K

Project Marketing Executive

1.8-2.7k base on performance

Direct Sales for Banking Products - Team Leader

Hmm... if I'm jobless.. I'll apply for the above job. =)

Guess I'm going mad soon if I continue to work at ***

I thought I can stay put for at least 2years, then find opportunity to go up to SRM. But it doesn't goes that way. Maybe after one year I'll join Citibank

M pretty interested in working sales side in a bank, but due to my age. I'm unqualified to sell any insurance products. =(

Anyway, by right should be meeting dear and his friends at barnone but they not going. Waited and waited for dear's reply, I already at the bus stop waiting for bus 502 express bus back home. Bought him herbal tea, thought of bringing down to Chillz and pass it to Emily. Get her to pass it to dear, but... after second thought... decided not to. Because... after dear drink the herbal tea, he'll drink his beer. So what's the point?

Guess I've been feeling very low these few days that I ate a lot. Till my gastric pain. Gotta control my diet so that I can save the dinner $ up.

Alright, gotta bath and do laundry. Dear will be back home early tonight.

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:08

11 August 2008

Slept till 3pm, woke up chatted with Zann in MSN. Last min we decided to meet up for dinner @ AMK Hub, Doreen joined us as well. Took cabby and went down to fetch Zann cuz she bringing lil' Malcom out with a scroller. By the time we reached there was already 8pm.

Guess lil' Malcom felt cold, because he kept crying to be carried. =) Pity Zann that she couldn't even have a peaceful dinner. So Doreen brought lil' Malcom out for a walk. Hmm... from my point of view, she's ready to be a good mother as well. =D

After which walked back together with Zann because is already very late and unsafe for her to walk back home alone. After sending her to the void deck, took bus 25 back to AMK Interchange. On my way back to JE, missed dear so much, he finally called and explained. I'll make sure he pack his handphone charger into his bag first!!!

Slept @ 12am+ manage to wake up early for work. So rotted shit working down here, no customer. Think my brain will be dead after half a year. Thinking that this job doesn't suits me, should I resign?

Famished.

Update

Still having gastric and headache, sobbs... dying soon.

Didn't go down to Chillz to settle the bill, because of my headache. Killing me!!!

"You that time already say will go with me then now say don't want. Only 1hr lesson, you can after work go Chillz Bar drink then just only one week one day go yoga lesson you say want go back early you know how much I look forward to it or not?"

Stop interfering my life.

I do not know whats her problem. What went wrong between us? You're looking forward towards to yoga class, then go ahead and attend the lesson. I'm withdrawing, not asking you to withdraw from the class together with me right? Stop texting me and calling me, 'll you?

I hope I'll luv myself more

11:01

10 August 2008

Last evening so surprised to receive Gina sms saying that she arrived in Singapore. Initial plan was to hang out with her at 24hrs Mac. Around 8pm baby sms saying that she wanna go Chillz, so texted Gina about it. But no reply from her, she fallen asleep. =( Was having headache, texted baby that I won't be going down. She said she'll be angry, so I took cabby down to Chillz. They ordered bucket. Then I ordered chicken wings, and dried hor fun shared among the 3 of us.

Dried hor fun. Still remember dear*2 teased me, said that my hor fun always dry one. Because bought dinner up to his office that night, the hor fun sauce dried up. As I accompanied Joanne back to do her lashes before going down to dear*2 office.

Left the pub at 3am, cuz both baby and Jas were tired. So we took cabby back home. Then Emily from Chillz texted me that they haven't bill off the bucket of drink. I was like... -.-" Monday gotta go back and pay off the bills, so sianz.

I do not know what exactly went wrong, I'm just worried sick.

I hope I'll luv myself more

15:52

09 August 2008

Haven't been blogging from home. =)

But I couldn't find the picture that I took with Joanne. =( Post up some other day.

Didn't know that is not good to attend a wake and birthday party on the same day. So I sms Zhu*2 that I won't be going to her birthday celebration. Then she said she's not supertitious, me too. So I reached Chillz, walked in to the washroom to wash up my face and hands. Though I was alone, but I enjoyed myself. =) Didn't know her friend at all, only get to sing songs together with Evelyn and YL (FOC waitress). Emily don't even allows me to help her out when she's short handed, jealous*

Was waiting for him to ring me up and ask me to be back home early, but he didn't. Maybe he's exhausted. So used to his call every nights.

Zhu*2 drank so much till her nose bleed. And she lost all her gifts. ='( Is a Shiseido cream base eye liner that cost me 43bucks, my dear.

Waiting for Wednesday to come

I hope I'll luv myself more

18:53

08 August 2008

Morning, system will be up only at noon time. =(

Last evening after work went to FEP to get my stocking, then saw that salesgirl that I met @ JP. She still remember me. Went down to basement to shop, bought a dress. Looks a lil' small and no trying but I like it very much, so I bought it! =D

Head down to PS to meet dear, he bought me hotdog bread for dinner. Watched Mummy, nice show... but don't understand why most of friends commented bored. After which went down to Utopia pub @ Outram. All his friends were very nice and took good care of me when dear out for smoke.

Took train to bedok then took a cab to dear place. His dad was still awake when we reached home. Dear prepared supper but I didn't have it cuz was too tired.

Wondering whats wrong with dear*2 at night. Was a queen size bed, why must you squeeze all the way to my side that I slept so near to the wall? =) This morning woke up, walked to the bathroom. Tried to switch on the light, but was not working. Dear changed the light bulb for me. =) Left home at 7am and took bus 5 to FEP. Dear initial plan was to have breakfast together, but looks like we've no time for that. Dear suggested Mac breakfast, haa... asked dear "Must our breakfast be mac everyday?" End up didn't buy, dear just walked with me to tower B. Hmm... misses.

Just wonder, will he call like he called me when he was at BK?

Later after work gotta go cine to get the birthday present for Zhu. Gonna meet up with Doreen to attend a wake at JC. After that heading down to Chillz to celebrate Zhu birthday for her. Woohoo ~ Thought she wouldn't invite me, but she does.

Reached work place was being told that the vault reg book was not kept. =(

nag.NAG.nAgs

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:11

07 August 2008

System down and will only be up at 1.30pm. Sighs... disappointed with *** banking system.

Last night had my dinner with Jasmine, we chatted till about 9.20pm then headed to 77th street to get a top for my dress. Then rushed down to JL to get my lingeries. Thanks for accompanying me the whole evening.

For once he rang me up 4times. 3times when I was having dinner with Jasmine. The third time he called to inform me that he manage to book the tix for this evening. =) Hmm.. informed him that I've to attend a wake. Dear did ask if I can change it to Friday instead. I gave a second thought and thought of what Zann advised, I decided to go on Friday evening. Tonight as promised dear that I'll accompany him throughout the night, so I shall not break my promise. Whatever the rest gonna think or say about me, I don't deny that I'm selfish.

This week been very moody, things are not getting right for me and my friends. Why?

mom.dear.friends. who should weights the lil' 0.01% more in my heart?

sorry just seems so hard to say

exhausted

Your blog entries gave me the answer that my mom should weight that lil' 0.01% more. The very first day I came out to society to work, I no longer stay together with my parents. It had been 1year 2months? I missed those days when I was being pampered and showered with unconditional love by 'em. Thanks!

I hope my probation period will be over soon, so that I can take one day leave to bring my mom out to shop and to eat. It has been more than a year that mumy last came to town. Looking forward to October, coz 'll receive GOP from govt, my 3mths incentive+ my pay. Gonna bring mom out for fabulous dinner.

sobbed after reading her entries

Friday night, I'll be there for you the whole night, I promise.

B strong, I'll be stood by your side and be ur pillar.

Looking at the calender, October already had 2 PH. Intend to take leave on 27 but not very nice. Because our pay day falls on Sat, so Monday will be very busy. Hm shall see how, retreat mummy on my birthday? =D

Jasmine asked me last night when we had dinner together that how am I going to celebrate my 21st birthday. My initial plan is to go TW with Kelly, but due to her schedule she couldn't make it. So no planning yet.

Yesterday was on the phone with Zann, though she's just one week older than me, she already walked through whole lots more. I learnt many things from her and I told dear that she said lots of + points for dear. =) Strange, they don't even meet up with each other before ley. =P

After ended the conversation with Zann, called dear up. He sounded dead beat, so asked him to rest early. Dear don't sound good either, wondering whats went wrong for him at work. Kinda worried. But shall not disturb him at work eh?

And I woke up late yesterday and today. Sighs... 50 over bucks on cabby. Stupid right?

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:19

06 August 2008

Yesterday meet up with Gina at WestMall for dinner, guess I ate way too much. Perhaps, is because m feeling low. Gastric since Sunday, might due to over eat at dear's place. Wanna get a top to match my dress but didn't manage to shop for it.

Dear*2 always manage to message or call me the very moment I reached home. Haha... telepathic? Alright, dear kept his promise he didn't drink much though they ordered 18jugs of beer. Dear still very awake, he talked about Dora again. Hmm... umpteen times that I've told him not to bother about her. Haha... dear*2 said if I were to slap her, he'll give me all his happiness. -.-" I really can't stand the way dear*2 joke with me. Dear kept saying his things as ours. Hmm.. we shall see.

Thursday would be going over to his place cuz Friday morning dear leaving to KL for meeting. =( Nevermind. But maybe after watching the show, I'll drop by Valencia block. Hmm.. shall not disclose too much over here. Babe, promise to be strong. I believe he'll still give you all the guidance that you need.

Later meeting Jasmine for dinner... =)

Madness... I want to apply for citibank card.

I hope I'll luv myself more

15:15

05 August 2008

Morning.

Last evening took train with Fo Mei, unsure why we took the wrong side of the train. Departed with her at City Hall. I should alight at next stop, Raffles but I forgotten... took the train to Marina Bay back to Raffles again. Alighted wanna change to train heading back to west side, but I took the wrong train again. Alighted @ Bugis to buy chocolate eclair for Emily. But ran out of stock, so bought her the eclair puff instead. And, without fail my cheesesticks. Was feeling famised because didn't had anything the entire day. So bought crab crawls and ate at the platform while waiting for train. Meet up with Gina @ Raffles control to Chillz Bar.

Walking towards Chillz, we passby Mac so we bought 2 apple pies. Reached Chillz.. realised that Emily forgotten to order my dry fried hor fun for me. So asked her to order mine as well as fried bee hoon for Gina.

Shortly, Eric came with his colleagues. Didn't expect him to be there, because I thought dear said he gotta entertain his clients? Anyway, nice knowing his colleague, Jasmine. She took two of our legs, and showed it to us. I discovered that my legs are so rough than dear's pant. =( Time to go for a jog?

I was playing the chip away (machine game) and forgotten that I actually left my mobile on the table. When I went back to the table, realised that I lost my phone. Shit, I was so panicked that I told Audrey (waitress @ chillz) about it. She asked did Eric took your phone? I couldn't be bothered to check with dear. Guess was Gina went over to ask him? I went out feeling like bashing him hard, but really thanks dear for keeping my hp for me. Thanks lot!

Head back home at about 10pm, reached home thought that I would wash up my clothes but was too tired. Didn't even blog, waited for dear to call till I fall asleep.

He called only at 1.20am+ must had drank a lot, sighs. Falling sick still don't know how to control his drinking and smoking.

Woke up late this morning, but still manage to reach work place on time. Thought Fo Mei will be late, luckily she didn't. Because my vault key is inside my cash box which is inside the vault. Without the vault key, how to get my cash box out? Then Eileen will starts nagging at me AGAIN!

Very sweet of FM to buy us soya bean drink from Mr Bean. Thanks. Then our tea lady prepared fan su ye with shrimp for us. Wah... was like so darn good working down here. Tomorrow, 'll 've sandwiches from Eileen.

Working at ABN NAC will definitely put on weights.

I hope I'll luv myself more

09:28

04 August 2008

Yesterday dear*2 only called near 1am+ and when he called, the first thing he said: "Dear*2, I'm drunk already. My travel agents made me drink."

I got so worried sick for him, and he promised to call when he reached home. But already past 2am, then he sms me and asked if I want him to call my cellphone or house. Of cuz my mobile.

Waited n waited, no call from dear*2. Sms him and asked him don't bother to call. Cuz thought he was so drunk to call me. Shortly he called.

He said "Dear*2, why not you move over. I'm going to get a new wardrobe, I'll pack half and the other half you bring some clothes over."

Then we talked about our future, he said he's going to take over his dad house. Then I told dear*2 to let my mom move in together with us, he said No. I was so stunned. Dear asked me to take my car licence and he'll buy me a car and I can always drive back to visit my mom. Then I further explained myself that if mom is over here with us, she can help us take care of the house. Then dear said he'll do all the housework for me. Then I told dear that if we've a kid, then mom can take care of the children. He said he'll take care of that. Dear ended the call with "Tonight you come over, I'll see how important I'm to you". I was left speechless, then I realised that dear joke with me.

I sms dear "Dear, you should know that even if I don't go over tonight, you still weights the same s my mom in my heart".

Then dear replied: "Just joking with you, if you don't come over i'll still luv you"

Dear never get serious, and I always get too serious.

I hope I'll luv myself more

10:04

03 August 2008

Supposedly to meet up Doreen at Taka to buy our yoga mat but in the end, both of us didn't buy it. She couldn't find the one that she wants, and I gotta head down to expo to meet dear up. So I'll buy it on Tuesday.

Went to FEP to had our dinner at Sakura Restaurant, ordered Fried Rice, Hor Fun, Oat Prawns, Salad You Tiao, Fried Wanton, Baby Scallop with Kai Lan, and drinks. Hees... so full.

Initial plan was to shop for flats with her, but in the end... looks like she's accompanying me shopping. Thanks babe... despite of the pain that heels caused, you still willing to bring me around to shop for my stuffs. Appreciate it lots!

Seek his permission to go to white sands before heading down to expo. So bought donuts from donuts empire for his lil' nephews and nieces. After which took cabby down to Expo to find him, he was with his mentor drinking at Jazz pub? After which took cabby back to his place.

Saturday afternoon woke up showered and ate chicken rice inside his room prepared by his mummy. Wah, fabulous! Then think we went back to sleep again. Had dinner at the nearby hawker. Bought minced meat noodle for dear. Took cabby with dear, he dropped me off at party world at chinatown. Cuz I meeting Elaine, Juliana, CT PFC and her boyfriend for k session. Elaine and Juliana can sang very well. Then dear headed down to the nearby pub to drink with his friends. After partying, dear asked his friend to give us a lift back home. So they came to party world to pick me up. Dear bought me fillet-o-fish burger for supper. =( He said he wanna feed me till fat fat. =(

Stayed another night at his place, guess we had a good chat on Saturday night. Hmm... dear slept at 5am plus, then I slept at 6am plus... cuz his parents play MJ, I can't sleep worx. But dear dear can sleep so well, he said is because of my presence. =)

Should wake up in the morning to watch mummy with dear at TP. But haha... dear didn't wake me up, I slept till 1pm. So took my shower and ate steamboat with dear. His brother kids are so cute. They love to disturb him. Adorable!

Then dear*2 asked if I prefer to take train or express bus back home. I told him that I'll take train with him, cuz is more convenience for him as he's going down to expo for NATAS fair. But he said, he wanna me take bus because I might get a seat compared to taking train. So thoughtful eh? Dear accompanined me to wake for 506.

Took express bus 506 back to JE. Reached JP sms jie*2 if they wanna me buy dinner back. Jie jie said they wanna go to IMM. So... meet 'em down there for dinner.

Hmm... reached home, just showered out and done with my laundry. Now waiting for the washing machine to stop, so that I can hang my clothes out. Mummy sat beside me, nagging at me for throwing my office wear inside the washing machine. Dearest mummy, I'm too tired to use hand to wash up. Because I already hand washed up those white clothes.

Waiting for dear call...

Oh yah... coming weekend dear would be away to KL. End of Sep dear would be going to Australia? Then just one day before dear's birthday, he would be away to Paris for one week. Then dear, when is our Genting trip with Shawn and Gina?

Tomorrow hopefully I can 've a good rest. Then Tuesday gotta learn yoga, Wednesday gotta meet Jasmine up for dinner. Thursday gotta accompany dear to watch mummy, then Friday gotta rest well. Saturday Zhuling birthday, partying. Sunday if possible, dinner with dear.

I hope I'll luv myself more

22:44

01 August 2008

ARGH ENOUGH!!!

CAN YOU STOP YOUR NAGGING?

WHAT DONE IS ALREADY DONE, IF IT'S WRONG REVERSE IT OUT AND SHUT UP.

Fo Mei, my good partner at work posted entries wrongly. But so what? Human beings do make mistakes. Since it's wrong, then you reverse it out for her. Stop your nagging.

I couldn't stand her nagging that I left my pass on my table. Couldn't go to the washroom, couldn't get back to my seat. Fo Mei open the door for me, thanks.

After nagging also didn't help her to do reversal, sucks.

Seriously I think this bank just like hell, sucks systems that always will be up late. What if customer wanna do transaction and rushing for time? Tooth. Then not many walk-in customer, I rotted at work place. Nothing much I can learn. Madness, though the employee size is small, easier to get promoted, but I really don't fancy it. Especially gotta work with such people. You think the 3 of us are your dogs arh? @#^$#^!

I hope I'll luv myself more

14:19

Been busy this entire week, Monday meet up with Joanne to do our lashes. Shall post up the photo we took when I'm back home blogging.

Tuesday by right meeting Jasmine for dinner at her work place @ PS. But I took the wrong side of bus, when I realised... the bus already at highway exit all the way out to JE. So took bus back home, changed and took Bus 99 to Boon Lay instead. Had stingray, sotong, kang kong veggie, otah, sugar cane. Shared the dinner. Had a very good chat with her. Went back home at about 10.30pm where my niece starts nagging at me =(

Wednesday meet up with Gina and Eric for movie (Money Not Enough II), nice touching show. Cried inside the cinema and Eric tried to wipe off my tears but I moved away. I was thinking, if one day my close one left me... will I regret of not spending much time with her when she's around. After watching, the thought of moving back home arise again.

After that was planning to head back home but saw Shawn and Gina (GTA) at PS. So Eric asked 'em down to Chillz Bar for drink, so Gina and I tagged along. I guess I drank too much and was really drunk (for the first time, I admit that I'm drunk) thanks to Gina to sent me back home first. Had a hard time after got down from cab. But still manage to walk into my room and wake up early for work. Not bad eh? =D

Eric told me that I nearly got knock down by a cab, and luckily the driver drove very slowly. Otherwise... .. .

Yesterday is the only day that I got back home early. Initial plan was to meet up with Gina after helping the old man with his things. But was being called off by her, so didn't go out last night.

Waited for my bro-in-law to be out from the bathroom, but guess I too tired that I fallen asleep all the way till this morning.

Haven't been wearing the 5inches high heel for like a couple of months and this morning walking with that pair of heel is so tough for me. Anyway, was running late for work so took cabby to work. Shag, thought this week I won't take cab to work but sighs. And even if I don't take cab to work, I will still take cab to some where else. Haix... forget it... is a bad habit that is so difficult to quit off.

When I reached the branch, BOM asked such a question "Last night you didn't go back home, went to the nearby hotel and stayed overnight?" because I reached branch at 8.15am. And I starts to dislike her a lil', because I felt that she's just so fake. Mask wearer

Branch is so quiet with no walk in customer. Cyril drop by and asked if we wanna have something for breakfast as he's going out to buy. So I asked him to get me a packet of fried bee hoon. Since system is not even up by 10.30am can't I eat my breakfast? And since you're so calculative, then is fine with me for no lunch time today.

Don't even ask me to do so many things can or not? Sucks.

Later after work gonna meet Doreen to buy the yoga mat. Also accompanying her to FEP to get flats. After which heading to Expo to meet Eric. Haha... dear*2 suddenly wanna go Genting. So last min planning doubt he'll be able to get the ticket. So staying overnight at dear place. Hees.. luckily we're not going, otherwise dear*2 gonna be mad with me, cuz I forgotten my passport.

Tomorrow meeting ex-colleague Elaine and Juliana for K session. Hmm... at night heading to Chillz for drink with baby.

Next week won't be free on Monday, Tuesday,Wednesday and Satuday.

Monday - Might be meeting Gina aka Mrs Teo for drink @ Chillz

Tuesday - Yoga Class

Wednesday-Meeting Jas for dinner/drink

Saturday - Zhuling Birthday might be headign to Chillz to celebrate for her

And not forgetting, my junior Chong Hwee's birthday on Friday

Hectic week. So sorry to dear that I've no time for him.

I hope I'll luv myself more

10:20